Saturday 14 April 2018

Commission - I'm Rubber You're Glue

Jeff was roused from his slumber by the slamming of the front door. He had fallen asleep on the couch watching football as he had the house to himself, at least he did. The door opened once more as he sat up in his chair and he was met by the furious visage of his wife Alicia.

"Don't you walk away from me young lady!" She shouted as she crossed the threshold.

Jeff closed his eyes, realising exactly what was about to interrupt his peaceful Sunday he let out a small sigh and tried to concentrate on the game.

"For god's sake mom leave me alone!" Shrieked his daughter Tanya

"I will not! Your behaviour today was reprehensible and I will not rest until you see why!"




Jeff shook his head, wondering if he'd be able to sneak out and catch the rest of the match down the pub, he thought better of it, his wife was obviously in a foul mood over something his daughter had done on their joint shopping trip and he didn't want to risk incurring her wrath. Instead he just turned up the volume on the television, hoping to drown out the noise of the arguing women.

His luck was not in however as they both stormed into the living room to continue their disagreement.

"Really, mom. It's not a big deal!" 

His daughter was stood defiant, hand firmly planted on her hip as she sipped from her fountain drink. Slim figured and with glossy blonde curls adorning her head, Jeff couldn't be accused of bias when he described his daughter as a beautiful young woman, everyone would agree.

"I will not have my daughter thought as of a hussy!" Shouted Alicia. 

Jeff knew better than to get involved when these two were on the warpath but couldn't help but steal a glance at his wife. Sure, her figure had softened over the 22 years they had been married, she had carried two of his children after all. He still thought she was as lovely as the day he first met her, when she wasn't screaming at their youngest of course. If only they could get along for more than five minutes a day.

Jeff cranked the volume on the tv again as if to subtly break it to the women in his life that he'd quite like to be left in peace. It was all together too subtle a signal.

"Hussy? Hussy?! Jesus Christ mom the guy's a fucking nerd!"

"Language!" At least Jeff and Alicia were on the same page when it came to cursing.

"All I'm saying is if the loser wants to buy me things because he thinks he's somehow gonna get lucky, it's not my job to give him a dose of reality!" Continued Tanya

"It is your job not to lead the poor guy on! He's clearly smitten with you and you're taking advantage of his kind nature! If you only give him attention because he buys you things you're no better than a common whore!"



"Damn, that was a bit strong" thought Jeff

"Oh my god mom! How can you say that?!"

"Because it's the truth! You parade yourself in front of guys just to get your shiny trinkets, you don't care how they feel and it's wrong! You lead on nice guys like David while doing your upmost to sleep your way through your friend group!"

"You're so jealous!" Retorted Tanya "You wish you could've had the influence I have when you were my age but you were too busy stuffing your face at the pizza place with your nerdy friends! The only reason you stick up for them is because you know how it feels to be a fat loser!"

"I was not a fat loser when I was your age! Tell her Jeff!"



Jeff just rolled his eyes and edged closer to the television.

"Well if you weren't a loser when you were my age maybe it's because you're a fat slob now! Maybe if you lost some weight you wouldn't be so jealous of your own daughter, it's kinda pathetic really"

"Jeff! Are you going to let her talk to me like that?!"



Jeff had had enough at this point and got to his feet, turning off the television.

"Face it mom, if you weren't such a slob maybe you'd get laid more often and wouldn't be so jealous"

"Oh you little slut, how dare you talk to me like that!"

"Enough!" Shouted Jeff "I get one day to myself a week and you two can't leave me in peace for it! I'm going to the pub if anyone needs me, this had better be sorted when I come home!"

"Fat chance!" Sneered Alicia

"Yeah, fat like your ass!" Retorted Tanya

Three slammed doors later and the living room was finally empty. However, had someone still been present they may have questioned the freaky Tiki statue that Jeff just had to have for his study when they picked it up at a garage sale the previous day and why it's eyes seemed to emit a strange green glow. Unfortunately though, no-one was any the wiser.



Week 1

Things fell back into the normal routine for the rest of the week. Or at least everyone thought they did. Jeff went to work each day, as did Alicia and Tanya went to college like she was supposed to. Well as far as her parents knew anyway. She had actual spent Wednesday at home, sitting around watching YouTube. What her parents didn't know wouldn't hurt them she surmised and she worked hard, she deserved a day to herself once in a while didn't she?

When Saturday rolled around Alicia surprised Jeff. Not only did he awake to find his wife's lips around his cock which led to some impromptu love making before breakfast but after a relatively light meal she had suggested that they go for a jog.

Alicia wasn't normally one for exercise and preferred to spend her Saturdays exploring local markets or doing crafty things, maybe sunning herself in the back garden if the weather was suitable. Jeff was physically fit from his job at the lumberyard but figured his cardio could probably do with a bit a tune up so agreed to tag along.

He didn't even know that his wife owned workout gear so it was a bit of a novelty to see her come skipping downstairs – long brunette hair tied up in a high ponytail, clad in a vest top and leggings that had clearly been bought quite a while ago as evidenced by the clear outline of her chubby belly and round backside.

Jeff kept his pace to one step behind his wife on their jog, mainly because he liked to watch the show of her jiggling arse as she kept pace just in front of him but also because she just seemed so full of energy. He guessed that he'd have a hard time catching her even if he wanted to try. A thought seemingly made fact when after about half an hour of jogging when the pair were about a block away from home, Alicia turned to Jeff and simply said

"Race you home!" Before speeding off leaving Jeff confused as well as quite out of breath. Just what had come over his wife?



When he finally made it to the driveway his wife was jumping on the spot, belly and boobs quivering as she did.

"To the winner go the spoils!" She shouted as he trudged towards her.

"Oh yeah? And what do they entail?" He asked breathlessly

"Don't worry, I'm sure they'll be pleasurable for the both of us" she giggled as she shared a smooch with her man on their front doorstep.

They were startled by the opening of the door, out stepped a portly young man with slightly greasy brown hair and a thick pair of glasses perched on his nose. Alicia recognised the lad in the Star Wars t-shirt.

"Oh hello David, been to see Tanya?" She asked, breaking off her embrace from Jeff.

"Hello Mrs Torrance, Mr Torrance. Yes I just had to pop round with some err things that Tanya left in erm class on Wednesday" Lying about why he was actually there had made David quite sweaty and awkward when talking to Alicia, luckily for him he always appeared somewhat sweaty and awkward so it wasn't especially noticeable.

Of course, Tanya hadn't been to class on Wednesday so what he had actually dropped off were the notes from the class that Tanya had coerced him into giving to her.

"Anyway, I must be off. Good day to you both" and with that David shuffled off towards home.

"Gees, what a dork" laughed Jeff

"Oh be nice" laughed Alicia, mock punching Jeff in the shoulder

"I almost don't blame Tanya for taking advantage of the chump" he laughed as he opened the front door"

"Hardly a good example" replied Alicia, her tone turning serious for a moment "Tanya? Tanya, where are you?" She shouted into the house.

"Oh great, here we go" thought Jeff



"I'm through here" shouted Tanya from the living room.

As her parents made their way through they found their daughter slouched on the sofa watching cartoons on the television.

"Tanya! What did I tell you about taking advantage of that poor boy?" Shouted Alicia

The eye roll that Tanya gave was mirrored by one from her father, albeit behind Alicia's back.

"Jesus calm down mom, I wasn't taking advantage of anyone! I left one of my text books in class earlier in the week and David picked it up for me. We didn't run into each other for the rest of the week and I needed it to do work before next class so he just dropped it round, nothing to get your panties in a bunch about!"

Alicia scowled at her daughter, not fully believing her but with no evidence to the contrary. Tanya felt quite smug that the story she concocted and relayed to David had clearly worked and her mother had no leg to stand on. She turned her attention back to the television and the bag of Doritos she was enjoying. Had Alicia been paying closer attention she would have picked up on the fact that those tortilla chips had to have come from somewhere as they didn't have any in the house and of course Tanya had gotten David to stop by the store on his way round and get her a few things.

"Well you could have tidied up a bit round here if you knew you were having company" scolded Alicia picking up what she surmised were her daughter's plates from the previous evening's meal and breakfast that were left on the floor, they were in fact just the one's she had used for her breakfast.

"I'd hardly call David company mom" laughed Tanya in reply

"Nevertheless, you could make a bit of an effort. What would Jason think of you entertaining other men in your pyjamas huh?"

The mention of her current beau bought Tanya's attention back to her mother.

"I'm sure he'd be impressed that I was able to get whatever I wanted from that loser without as much as making an effort, I bet he'd find it rather industrious" she tugged her top down over her belly as she said this, it wasn't much but the rather large breakfast she had consumed and the large bag of Doritos she was munching on had made her belly swell out more than it normally did, again not noticeable to those not paying attention but things weren't quite right in the Torrance household.

"Well I find it quite slovenly" remarked Alicia as she made her way to the kitchen to wash up the plates left by her daughter.

"Whatever mom" shouted Tanya as she took a swig from the large bottle of Fanta she had beside her.



Jeff almost couldn't believe it. What he assumed would devolve into another battle royale between the women in his life was over just as quick as it had started and with minimal shouting.

"Must be my lucky day!" He thought to himself. Pressing his luck further he decided to walk up behind Alicia and wrap his arms around her before she started washing up.

"I believe madam winner had some spoils that she wished to claim?" He whispered in her ear.

A wry smile formed on Alicia's face as she left the dishes in the sink, took Jeff by the hand and led him up to their bedroom.





Week 2

If the week following Alicia and Tanya's argument had gone by largely the same then the same couldn't be said out the second week.

Firstly, Tanya's skipping class became a growing habit with her missing two days this week, instead she had spent the days locked in her bedroom bingeing on junk food and playing video games, she had thought of them as a little nerdy before but David had been droning on about one of his favourites for what felt like years. She'd agreed to give it a go to shut him up more than anything and of course he was more than willing to buy her a copy, along with any snacks her heart desired. Tanya just saw this as another way to take advantage of the poor boy, caring little what the drastic dietary change was doing to her figure.

Tanya's figure had slowly inflated over the course of the two weeks and while the minor belly that she sported last week had been easy enough to conceal in sweats and baggy t-shirts this was no longer the case. Tanya now sported a layer of fat everywhere on her body. Her formerly slim abdomen was now hidden by a protruding belly that threatened to outgrow her breasts which had also grown taking on a spongy appearance, nestled between huskier looking arms. Her softened jawline looked as though it may sprout a double at any given moment, a fact emphasised whenever she yawned or ate. The rear-end that she spent an increasing amount of time on had also been hit by the changes that corrupted the girl's image. Taking on an over-ripe appearance that sat above thighs that now jiggled when she walked.

She had swelled so much that she had to cobble together outfits from her parent's closets when she bothered to leave the house. A hoodie taken from her father and bigger, stretchier leggings borrowed from her mother became a necessity just to be able to be out in public without being deemed obscene. When indoors however, she just sauntered around in tight t-shirts and increasingly stretched out panties.

Of course, her figure, no doubt would have been taken to task if there was anyone around to really notice. Jeff left for work before both Tanya and Alicia were even awake and normally didn't return until well into the evening so it wasn't unusual for his often-moody daughter to be in her room.

What was unusual though was the sudden boost in activities for his wife. In the past week Alicia had social gatherings on no less than three nights. Quite the rarity for someone who was a self-confessed "homebody". She had gone for drinks with the girls after work on Tuesday, started a weekly Zumba class on Thursday and had even gone clubbing on Friday night.

Jeff had thought it odd that his now middle-aged wife had wanted to go clubbing but she played it off as "wanting to take advantage of this new-found energy she had" and while it irked him that he missed out on dining with his wife three times that week he had to admit he was rather fond of the perks this wave of energy had bought with it.

Alicia was looking great! Better than she had in years! He could swear that she had lost a considerable amount of weight and thought she looked just as good as when they had begun dating over 25 years ago but now he truly believed rather than paying lip service. Not only that but he had gotten laid every single night that week and that hadn't happened in a very long time. Yes, if this is what his wife's renewed vigour and lust for life bought with it then he could stand to fix his own dinner a couple of times a week.

"That or order pizza" he thought to himself as stood wondering why there were so many pizza boxes in the trash.

"Tanya?" He shouted into the living room "Did you order pizza this week?"

He finally got a muffled "yeah" as a response.

"How many damn times?!"

"Jesus Christ Jeff have you got to shout so loud?" Alicia was clearly worse for wear from her partying the previous evening and had gotten home after Jeff had gone to bed.

"Why are there so many pizza boxes down here?" She asked blearily

"I don't know" replied Jeff "Tanya said she ordered pizza but she wouldn't have ordered this much would she?"

As if on cue, Tanya made her way into the kitchen, another pizza box in hand.

"Well I guess that answers your question" replied Alicia cattily, "get enough pizza there tubby?"

Tanya threw the box in the trash, yawned and stretched, revealing her now wobbly belly. "Well I was hungry and someone was out trying to desperately reclaim their youth rather than be a good wife and mother, it's pathetic if you ask me"

"Well it's a good job no-one is asking you isn't it?" Replied her mother "and hey maybe you could go to the bother of having a wash and changing your clothes? I very much doubt that sauce stain is from the pizza you just yourself on!"

"Why? Are you going to take care of your family and do some washing?! Bravo, bravo! Mom of the year right here!" Retorted Tanya

Before the argument could spiral out of control again Jeff stepped in. "I am not dealing with you guys fighting again! I don't know what the hell is going on around here but you two had better sort it and quick!" And with that he left two rather sour faced women to carry on with their days.



Week 3

The third week following Alicia and Tanya's fateful argument saw a remarkable upheaval in the Torrance household, especially when it came to both women's love interests.

Jeff had grabbed a few of his essential items and had left the family home that Saturday morning following a blazing row with Alicia on the Friday night. Alicia's after work activities had expanded in the past week to include every night, be it a colleague's leaving drinks or a new show that was in town that she just had to catch with her friends. Jeff had found it quite odd that she was suddenly quite busy every night but was supportive of his wife's new-found popularity especially as it had woken what had been a lacklustre sex life.

He had become suspicious however after Alicia failed to take her gym bag to work on Thursday and was supposed to be doing her Zumba class. His suspicions were all but confirmed when he was butt dialled by Alicia a little while later. On the other end of the phone he could clearly hear his wife giggling and fooling around with a guy. She came home drunk that evening but Jeff had chosen to sleep in the spare room anyway. Jeff went to work as normal on Friday but left a note for Alicia that they needed to talk after work and that he knew what she had been up to.

Alicia had to cancel on the guy she had arranged to see that evening and instead had it out with Jeff. It emerged that there were no social functions, no shows, no Zumba. Alicia had been going out with any guy she took a fancy to, shagging them behind her husband's back. Apparently, Jeff wasn't satisfying her any longer and she needed sex and lots of it. Jeff was dumbfounded, they'd been having sex every day for weeks, several times at the weekends. Hurt and saddened by his wife's actions he had suggested some time apart, this was met with indifference and in fact Alicia just got dressed for another night on the town.



Of course, it wasn't just Alicia's love life that had taken a turn for the worse. Tanya's relationship was also in turmoil.

Having not attended class all week and avoiding his phone calls, naturally Jason was worried about the wellbeing of his girlfriend. All attempts to meet up had been dodged by Tanya with lame excuses such as "I'm not feeling well" and "I'm tired". What was actually happening was that Tanya was far too lazy to leave the house, instead spending each day binge watching series on Netflix and binge eating cheap, microwavable meals.

Jason decided to pop round Tanya's house on that fateful Friday evening that Alicia and Jeff were set to have it out. In fact, he arrived just as Alicia was arriving home.

"Hello Jason love, here to see Tanya?"

"Hello Mrs Torrance, yes do you know if she's in?"

"Oh Jason you know you can call me Alicia" she replied while tracing her fingers over his chest.

"Oh okay then Alicia, is Tanya home?" Jason asked again, a little uncomfortable at his girlfriend's mom's tone and general behaviour

"Probably, it's not like her fat ass has anywhere else to be is it?"

Jason had no words but Alicia noticed the confused look on his face before leaning in and whispering in his ear "Personally, I think you are way too good for a slob like her. Anytime you fancy upgrading to the classic model you just give me a call okay?"

Jason was taken aback by Alicia's forward nature, never knowing her to be so overtly sexual before but he had to admit she was looking fine. Maybe she'd done something about her appearance but she was looking irresistible and literally dripped sex appeal.

Alicia looked back over her shoulder as she opened the front door "she'll be in her pit of a bedroom if you really want to find her"

As Jason made his way upstairs he could feel her eyes on him and turned around to meet her gaze, Alicia simply winked at him and mouthed "call me" before she slinked off to the kitchen.



Jason did knock at Tanya's door but the combination of her gaming headset and the noise of chewing in her ears meant that she didn't hear him. After not getting a response a second time Jason slowly eased the door open and peeked inside, what he saw flustered him.

"Oh! Oh I'm sorry, is this not Tanya's room?" He asked averting his gaze "I'm looking for my girlfriend Tanya"

"Godammit Jason, I just got sniped because of you, what are you doing here?"

Slowly it began to dawn on Jason that the half-naked woman crammed into a gaming chair was his overinflated girlfriend.

"Tanya?! Is that you?!"

"Well who else would it be, sitting in my room, playing on my PC drinking my soda?" She replied before taking a healthy swig

"But what happened to you?" He asked, taking in the vast difference to Tanya's physique as well of the complete mess her room was in.

"What the fuck are you talking about? Hey did you bring me over something to snack on?"

"Don't you think you've snacked enough?!" He replied in exasperation, motioning at the empty food cartons that littered Tanya's bedroom floor.

"Well you know I've always got room for a little more" she said patting her belly that now bulged so far over her shorts it was hard to tell if she was wearing any at all.

"Do I?! How on earth did you get so fat so fast?!"

"Good eating and genetics I guess" laughed Tanya as she shoved another fist of chips into her mouth

"And it stinks in here! When was the last time you had a wash?!"

"Ah I think I had a shower last week sometime. What's up with you anyway? You don't normally complain" her attention now firmly back on her game.

"Well my girlfriend isn't normally an obese, smelly pig that's why!"

"Ah cram it Jason, I'm not in the mood for hating so just make with the snacks or just piss off would ya?"

"Gladly!" Shouted Jason "Give me a call when you resemble my slim attractive girlfriend again would ya?"

"Don't hold your breath" replied Tanya as she lifted and ass cheek in his direction before letting rip with a loud fart and then giggling to herself.



Jason made his way outside where he was met by Alicia.

"Rough night huh stud? Why don't you take me for a drink and tell mama all about it?"



Week 4

By the time the fourth week rolled around the Torrance women were barely recognisable as those who argued in front of Jeff's weird Tiki statue.

Jeff had come by and collected the rest of his things whilst also serving Alicia with divorce papers. He was after a quickie divorce and didn't want his reputation sullied any further by being associated with the slut who had been his wife. She got a generous offer and took it on the proviso that he convert the dining room into a bedroom for their inexplicably large daughter.

With the absence of the Tiki statue the pronounced changes that had befell the women began to settle in to place.

Tanya was sat on her couch in the living room, it was her couch now as Alicia wouldn't sit on it for fear of getting grease marks or Cheeto dust on her clothes. She was joined by her new boyfriend David who barely squeezed himself between his love and the arm of the sofa. After Tanya got unceremoniously dumped by Jason, David was eager to jump into the role of boyfriend of the woman he had long lusted after.

It didn't matter to him that she somehow weighed a good 500lbs larger than she had just a month ago, he had the girl of his dreams and that was good enough for him. Of course, Tanya just saw him for what she could take him for still. She didn't mind being called David's girlfriend if it came with plenty of takeaways and access to his Crunchyroll subscription.



Alicia made her way downstairs, getting ready for yet another night out with another different guy. This one she had met after being called in by the college to discuss Tanya's sudden disappearance from the course. It hadn't taken a very long discussion for Alicia to slate her slovenly daughter.

"What can I say Professor Andrews?" She asked, eying the man like a cougar eyed its prey, "Tanya has decided to drop out of college in favour of a life of being a complete loser. But that doesn't mean we can't be friends, right?"

Alicia would be going for a meal with Professor Andrews on Tuesday night but tonight she was getting ready to see Jacob, a guy that she had picked up while deciding to leave the college campus via the gym.



"So where are you two young lovers off out to this Saturday night?" Asked Alicia as she took a seat across from Tanya and David

"Oh we're not going out tonight Mrs Torrance" replied David

"David, David, David please, call me Alicia and it's Ms Spencer anyway now"

"Okay, Alicia, we're going to stay in and watch Naruto, maybe get some pizza in...."

"We're definitely getting pizza in" interrupted Tanya

"As long as that's okay with you Ms Spencer, I mean Alicia"

"Well of course it is David, to be honest I'd be surprised if that wasn't what you two had planned" smirked Alicia

"Don't you have someone to be giving and STI to right about now?" Quipped Tanya

"Don't be jealous because I'm getting some and no one would touch you with a ten-foot barge pole honey".

"Whatever, have a great night slut"

"Oh I will don't you worry and do me a favour will you? Waddle your fat ass back into your hole before I get home. I won't be coming alone and I don't want the sight of your disgusting, stretch marked stomach to turn off my man. Toodles" And with that Alicia left for her night out.



Tanya didn't even flinch, keeping her attention set on the TV and the bag of pork rinds she was currently devouring.

"I don't think your stretch marks are disgusting" remarked David as he ran his hand over the expanse of his enormous girlfriend's belly "I think they're cute, just like you"

Tanya favoured him with a smile before firmly taking David's hand and removing it from her person.

"You know what would be cute?" She asked before returning her attention to the TV.

"What's that baby?"

"If you get to work ordering those pizzas stud muffin"

Tanya then proceeded to reel off a laundry list of items that she required from the local pizzeria.

"… and make sure you order before you get there so it won't take so long"

"Of course Angel, anything for you".

"And stop by the supermarket to pick up ice cream and doughnuts, you know the ones I like. They're cheaper there so you can get more of them" she smiled at the thought, amplifying the roundness of her features "get all that right and you may even get lucky tonight" she added with a wink.

David practically fell over himself getting his keys and coat, the ever-present lure of possibly losing his virginity meant that he would literally do almost anything Tanya asked of him.

Just before leaving the house he turned and gazed at the girl of his dreams.

"I love you" he managed to get out

"Thanks a lot" replied his gargantuan girlfriend.





Epilogue

After a while of living together without the influence of the Tiki statue, the obese slob of a daughter and the drunken slut of a mother started to see things a little more clearly. It was as if a fog was slowly lifted from their eyes and they could finally see what had been happening over the prior month.

You would think that each of them would be horrified at the changes that had befell them but the recognition came more like a slow reveal than a sudden shock. Slowly but surely both Tanya and Alicia realised that they hadn't always been so fat or so flirtatious, so unkempt or so unscrupulous.

Many nights were spent mourning lost figures, lost credibility, lost morals and lost relationships. Both women spent time slowly accepting their fates, this was their lives now and no amount of tears could change that.

Not that they had just relied on crying to turn their lives around, Tanya had decided to get back in shape – joining a gym and instructing David not to buy her the copious amounts of junk food that she demanded from him on a daily basis. But David was weak and as soon as Tanya would throw a strop about being tired and hungry he would come running – soda in one arm, ice cream in the other, never wanting to upset his dream girl.

Likewise, Alicia had vowed to stay in more often, stay away from college guys and try and reconcile with her husband. But he was too hurt by the revelation that his wife had been sleeping around town, a fact now known my many of the mothers of Tanya's former classmates. Besides, Jeff was quite content with the honest, faithful, hardworking girlfriend he had now. It was as if his best qualities had manifested themselves in this woman who had been his new neighbour and taken a particular interest in his Tiki statue.

Dejected, Alicia found it all too easy to drown her sorrows at bars more often than she should and when she drank it always led to her coming on to some young stud, as if she couldn't help herself.

As strong as the powers that worked against them were however, both women were able to reclaim a little part of the lives they had known before. Tanya wasn't quite so messy and managed to at least take out the trash once in a while and while Alicia found herself out of the house more often than not, she still made time to do some chores and cook some family meals for her and her daughter.

It was at the dinner table one night when both women realised the best thing that they managed to reclaim from their former lives was remembering that they didn't always hate each other. It may have taken enough to feed a small family just to satiate her daughter now but Alicia was going to make sure she did right by her. And sure, everyone in town thought her mom was a slut but Tanya wouldn't hear a bad word said against her. Yes, now the women's time together was harmonious, for the most part anyway as they chatted over dinner.

"So, is David coming over later?" Asked Alicia, genuinely interested in her daughter's budding relationship

"Yeah, he's going to bring his GameCube over and we're going to do a Mario Kart marathon" replied Tanya

"You two seem to be really hitting it off"

"Yeah well, he doesn't look down on me for my... ya know size and all and he's really not so bad once you get to know him"

"Well as long as he treats you right he's ok with me" smiled Alicia

"Are you heading out later?"

"Well I thought I might see if some of the girls wanted to go for a drink..."

She was cut off by Tanya grabbing her hand.

"You can tell me the truth mom, it's okay"

"Well I'm probably going to go out dancing with Jason, I know he's your ex but I have such a good time with him" Alicia replied sheepishly

"That's okay" said Tanya through a mouthful of mashed potatoes "if there was anyone who deserved to get the clap from you it's that asshole"

"Oh please, don't be jealous just because your mother gets laid whenever she wants and your only option is a dorky, virgin, wallflower"

"Well at least I know I won't have to go see the doctor after sleeping with David for the first time, unlike anyone who's unfortunate enough to pop their cherry with you!"

"Yeah, only because he isn't strong enough to shift your blubber out of the way to actually stick it in ya"

"Whore!"

"Fatass!"



Just as soon as the tension had risen, it dissipated when both women collapsed in fits of laughter. To most, the words said would form grudges that would last years but for Alicia and Tanya they knew that their tirades towards one another were just part of the curse that had been placed upon them and if they were to have any chance of moving on with their lives, they simply couldn't take each other's barbs to heart.

"Seriously though mom, have a great time, you deserve it"

"Oh I will, and you too. I'll leave money on the counter in case you feel peckish later. Oh who am I kidding, I'll leave your second dinner money for you" replied Alicia, clearing away the dishes.

"Thanks mom, I got you an extra-large pack of condoms when I was at the store earlier, I put them next to your handbag if you care to use them."

"That's very thoughtful of you dear, just remember to be out of sight when I get home"

"And you remember to bin any towels you and your multitude of lovers may use tonight" smiled Tanya

"Love you tubby"

"Love you too slutty"

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